Half done magpies

Red kites, radium b, Ravens

I want to ask the big questions in life, but I am a small person, infatuated with minutiae, and mostly I seem to ask the same question over and over. What are they up to? The crow, the cormorants, the lapwings, every week someone different, some new incomprehensible behaviour.

The playing field is full of kites today. Red kites, the bird. The field is speckled with groups of one or two kites, just sitting there. You can’t see what they are up to, they fly away if you get close enough to even see they’re a kite. All you can really see is massive birds sitting around which transform into kites once you can see their wings properly. Is a Kite even a kite unless it’s flying, I ask you? Also, what are they up to?

Sometimes you just find a field full of red kites having a sit down, even with binoculars, they’re just sitting there. Usually it’s a ploughed field and I figured they were just hanging out and looking for worms, but the playing fields are smooth and grassy and probably without snacks. I guess. What do I know? Not much, evidently.

(I can’t see to write captions this week but the red kites were not cooperating with photos, so have some helicopters )

It’s winter so the playing fields are set up for rugby. I do not have to stand about watching the rugby this year, because my son has switched to swimming. He had wanted to go to a physiotherapist because his hips hurt, which surprised me because I felt sure that hips hurting is a direct result of having hips, and I never needed a physiotherapist.  But then, I probably should’ve seen a physiotherapist when I was 15 instead of being told having joints that constantly hurt was normal and being given a strange substance mysteriously called in my dyslexic family ‘radium B’ to rub on them (it is actually called the equally mysterious Radian B).

I am hypermobile and my son is hypermobile and he decided to quit rowing and rugby and switch to swimming instead, so my days of regattas and damp rugby fields have come to an end, unless I’m walking across them for fun.

My son is far too much like me for my liking.  People are always blaming the quirks of their personality on circumstance, and yet I see whole aspects of my personality passed along as much as my hypermobile joints, despite him having a very different childhood to mine. It’s an odd thing, and I find myself appreciating traits in him before realising I have the same trait and I certainly don’t appreciate that in myself. There’s so much no one tells you about parenting; about how you miss the hundreds of incarnations of your child as he constantly sheds childhood, or how you suddenly see yourself reflected but in some new and loving light.

He tells me all the things he has to do to improve his stroke even though I have told him a hundred times, because it doesn’t count when your mother tells you. He is not the worst at swimming, despite swimming with the swimming club kids, kids with pools in their back garden, kids with parents that got up at 5am, when all he had was me and I can’t do a tumble turn.

I know theoretically how to tumble but I wouldn’t put myself in the position of having to do one. My son has learnt how to tumble turn and lies on the floor to demonstrate this new skill, knowing full well that this is not possible on dry land. I am in bed with a migraine, and he is cheering me up. He does a terrible rolypoly onto the bedframe and pushes off dramatically, pretending to give himself a carpet burn while narrating the steps necessary to perform the task. He’s not going to race. He’s not going to represent his school, he’s never going to be the fastest swimmer but he gives it 100%, throws himself into whatever he has to do so wholeheartedly I feel impressed.

I don’t know why I’m mentioning all  this, its just that I sometimes wonder how come I turn everything into work, how my hobbies are transformed under the microscope of perfectionism into anxious chores, and I begin to worry if I’m enjoying myself correctly, and then suddenly I find myself in a field of red kites thinking about how quitting rugby is a good thing, and realising the very same thing I hate about myself has a flipside I really admire in someone I love. Though sometimes I wish we’d both chill out.

‘I’m gonna be that guy at the pool’ he says with delight.

I shout ‘NO son of mine shall be THAT GUY’.

‘Yeah’ he says firmly ‘I’m gonna be that guy that puts his arse in your face’

‘Everyone hates tumble turn guy’ I tell him.

Workings.

I can’t quite remember where I’d got to last week, I think I’d decided that all my problems could be resolved by drawing another magpie. The good news is I have drawn another magpie, and got quite a way through carving him.

You’re probably wondering why I have two half carved magpies instead of one fully carved magpie. That is another question I cannot answer.

I’ve also finally listed my ravens. I just had to sit on this piece a while. Its really big and expensive so I found it quite daunting to list because well, its probably going to sit around in the shop for ever. It was intended to be an exhibition piece but it’s probably too big. I’m not earning enough to justify the cost of framing and transporting it about at the moment.

I will be using the raven plates in future work, I think. You can buy it here (unless you’re already discussing it with me in which case I already sent you a message you should check first).

Findings.

I’ve been bullet journaling for a year now and to celebrate I bought myself next years book (well, one of next years books, at least) and some more of these tiny little clips. I had one of these and they are perfect bookmarks, but I had no idea where I got it from. Thank goodness for google lens, because it turns out you get one free with every cult pens order, which is useful because that’s the only that seems to sell refill for the Inktense paint pans and I need some more teal green (the best colour) so what better reason to place an order?

(Choosing stickers for the raspberry journal)

Here are the reasons cult pens are good:

Firstly, they are helpful if you need to change your order after you placed it. Handprinted are good like this too, and it’s unusual.

Secondly you get the little paperclip with every order. It has a smile on it. Forgot to put it in the photo because I’m an idiot.

Thirdly I also got a complimentary packet of love hearts. I don’t have a picture of them because I ate them immediately.